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People who love chocolates are my friends.

May 2005 June 2005 July 2005 August 2005 September 2005 October 2005 November 2005 December 2005 January 2006 February 2006 March 2006 April 2006 May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010 December 2010 January 2011 February 2011 March 2011 April 2011 May 2011 June 2011 July 2011 August 2011 September 2011 October 2011 November 2011 December 2011 February 2012 April 2012 May 2012 July 2012 August 2012

she sashayed on the airport/plane connector in her jimmy choo's clutching her Kate Spade bag entering the boeing on her way to Frankfurt.

Her home country was long forgotten since she's been working in Singapore.
her life has been hectic since like forever.
but it lacks something. It lacks what most of her female counterparts have.
She doesn't believe in dating men, because she doesn't feel anything towards the produced men pheromones; that's her so called reason or rather excuse.
The real reason was she was afraid of the pain inflicted 10 years ago; she's not brave enough to face what had haunted her for so long.

She would occasionally go out with a few men, men with yatches of course, because her love for the ocean/beach would never cease. People may call her materialistic but it's not like men dont want her. She's worth everything.

She took care of her body really carefully, because she was teased of being fat when she was younger.
today, she doesn't look like she's 28.
She had this policy of not getting her face caked up with make-up which her mother forced her to when she joined this dancing competition.
mock her now, she dares the people who used to ridicule her.
They would never know that they had ruined a quarter of her childhood.

Even though she was rather successful but she's still power hungry.
she's so sick of being inferior when she was young.
When she was younger, she could never manage to get to top, someone would seem to overshadow her.
and she didnt like the feeling.
the feeling of insecureness.

Most of her school friends had started their own families, but what's she waiting for?
she didnt want to have children because she didn't want them to be bullied by other kids,
she didnt want them to compete with other kids,
she didnt want them to compete with their own siblings like she did when she was younger.
She didnt have the heart to have a 'favourite' in the family and neglect the other child.

She's a workaholic, because when she wasn't working she would think of the past; not the happy memories but what had hurt her.
and on other times, when she's home in her condo, she would play some tunes on her baby grand piano that she saved for months to purchase.
that's her. the pessimistic her.

she would go on vacation every year splurging on shoes and clothes and bags and her so called wants because she didnt have them when she was young.
She was the last child and all she had was 'hand-me-downs' which she detested.
She vowed never to enter the $1.80 budget shops because her mother had always bought stuff from there that smelled so strongly of musk which she hated so very much.

Her sense of insecurity would never cease.
She is afraid of everything even if her exterior projects her as a strong woman.





bimbo alert.

i went to jap class just now, and teacher asked us why we enrolled for jap class.
i said bimbo-ishly as expected " because I WANT TO MARRY A JAPANESE PERSON"
and i had to repeat it 3 times because she didnt quite get me, or maybe she wanted me to change my answer to make it more educational.
that was embarrassing, so please don't try it.
The shame was to an extent that i really wanted to run out of the room.

Labels: fiction